Thursday, February 12, 2009

Mistake #25 You Keep Him Hanging On...(woo, ooh!)


(Seriously, cut the strings already...)

You girls are ridiculous. Period. Why in the world are you still dating the same guy who hasn't made any progress whatsoever? I can see a stagnant relationship after like a few weeks (we get nervous yo!), but a few months that lead into a few years? Well, if you are in this predicament you deserve to stay single. After awhile when things aren't moving in your so-called "relationship" get the "H" out! What are waiting for? Oh I know... for him to say, "Oh my bad babe, I just had a brain fart for the last 2.5 years. Let's get married!?" Do you realize for every girl trying to make this relationship work, there is a guy trying to find a way out?

And you probably do think it's his fault. Remember when you point a finger, three fingers are pointing back at you. It's your fault, because you are probably railroading the guy to stay in the relationship with your non-important "problems" and your overactive "hormones". Hormones? Really? So you're going through stuff most women go through at 55? Please. I'm not buying that crap, so why should you subject that to him? Let him out and make it seem like it's your idea. You'll figure out who are the keepers and who have just wasted the prime baby making years of your life. If you're mature enough to date, then you're mature enough to stop complaining to your girlfriends and get out.

Well, let's just look at the ramifications to this situation. Let's just say, for kicks and giggles, your obtuse lack of intelligence allows you to stick with him another 3-4 years and finally he's pressured from you, his family, his friends, the Church, and Obama to "make an honest woman of you." You really want to know why 50% of all marriages end in divorce? Well, it's stupid crap like this. If dude is not making an effort, you're not worth it to him. Did you hear me? You're. Not. Worth. It. I hope those are some sobering words to your sad relationship, because apparently you're not listening to reason anywhere else. Spoiler Alert: And if you think things will turn out like Jennifer Aniston and Ben Affleck in He's Just Not That Into You, then maybe I should pity you instead of ridiculing you.

If you're the doormat type, email me because I got some dirty shoes with crap on the bottoms. If not, drop his ace like a bad habit.

21 comments:

  1. I used to really enjoy this blog, but it's about to work its way out of my regular rotation. It's gotten boring and mean-spirited.

    Not laughing, guys.

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  2. Oh how I wish this post was around in 2006. Even if it had been, I probably wouldn't have seen myself in it. Fast forward 3 years later- I wasted 2 prime spring chicken years at BYU with a LOSER. I've now been single a year, and I'm ready to get back into dating. How I wish I had dropped his sorry-a** 3 weeks into our relationship when I had a prompting to do so! Listen to your gut girls!!!

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  3. I'm wondering if this is a new author because you seem rather bitter and pissy lately rather than helpful. You ok? Saying "You're not worth it" is a bit harsh. EVERYone (male or female) is worth it and deserves to be happy and loved and cherished by someone. I agree with you, however, that guys who make no progress may feel as though that particular girl is "not worth it" to them specifically. But that doesn't mean the girl isn't worth it to someone else.

    It's just like on a mission.. eternal investigators/friends of the missionaries are a waste of time. Although they may dish out some sweet food or sweet entertainment every once in awhile, ultimately it's a waste of the missionaries' time. They're unwilling to do the basics (read, pray, come to church, etc). Guys who want to "keep you hanging" are the same way-unwilling to make tiny committments, which means in the long run, there's no way they'd ever go for the big M word (that's why the missioanries never even bother challenging these 'friends" to baptism.

    So if you weren't into wasting your time with eternal investigators on the mission, then I suggest you drop those stupid arse guys the same way you left those folks for the JWs.

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  5. Sorry! I accidentally deleted my posts, but...

    Wait! I've never had this happen to me, but shouldn't the guy break it off if he doesn't like it? I mean if a girl is still in a relationship with someone it's because she really likes him, so how would she know when he doesn't want to date anymore?
    I'm sorry if this seems like a dumb question, I've just never experienced this before and I don't want to have it happen to me!

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  6. I thought it was funny... and true. There's some girls who are clinging to a dead horse that is going absolutely nowhere. Often, that horse is named "Elder."

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  7. The truth of it is that this story is a REVERSE of the real situation. He is hanging on to his ex-girlfriend who wants NOTHING of him!!! NOTHING!!! He's literally BEGGING on his knees, and she won't take him back!! That's why he's so pissy here. Dude, move on! Maybe THAT'S why you are still single!!!

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  8. "I'm wondering if this is a new author because you seem rather bitter and pissy lately rather than helpful. You ok? "

    My guess is that it's the "Valentines/Singles Awareness Day" blues, if you're alone you feel extra lonely and bitter.

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  9. "Mean spirited"?? oh my heck. to me, it's truthful. i like the Disclaimer at the bottom of the page. "Be thankful the Lord blessed another individual with patience enough to save you from your inevitable self destruction.
    Be of good cheer!"

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  10. Wow. Good post! Perfect example of what this blog is or should be about: Real reasons why we're all still single. What a kick in the face to those of us that NEED it. So thanks.

    I don't think that it was too harsh or bitter at all. It's only tough love you're giving us, right? If a girl is dumb enough to be sitting around for 3 in a stagnant situation - she needs a kick in the face! This really is a legitimate reason WHY MORMON GIRLS STAY SINGLE.

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  11. The picture for this post is wrong. It should be a girl puppet with strings attached to her, not a guy. You're welcome.

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  12. I think it should be reedited to say YOU ARE NOT WORTH IT TO HIM because you are worth it to someone just not that someone

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  13. I've seen this type of activity by both genders. I've seen guys hang on in a stagnant relations for two long too.

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  14. good advise but you shouldn't tell any girl or anyone that they are not worth it. Have you ever heard of a song called, "I'm a child of God?" ;) How is a girl to stand up for herself and get enough confidence to let go of her dead-beat relationship if you're telling her she is of no worth? you should say instead, "He is not worth your precious time and energy. Go find someone else that truly appreciates your worth."

    Ur welcome. :)

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  15. This post should change its title to: "You don't really love me, you just keep me hangin' on..." Girls can be so foolish to hang on to a guy who just wastes her time and she ends up saying "but I thought we were...". Girls, don't be foolish. In fact, let's flip the roles instead. Make HIM wait. Forever. See if he gives up.

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  16. I can't believe you try and pass yourself off as a dude. You're a total chick and you know it. What guy would ever write: "You girls are ridiculous. Period. Why in the world are you still dating the same guy who hasn't made any progress whatsoever? I can see a stagnant relationship after like a few weeks (we get nervous yo!)". Nice try, though.

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  17. RE: Aubrey... there's warning signs when a relationship is starting to fail... trust me i know... but SAVE IT! if you really like the guy or girl you're with work through the darn problem.

    now guys... and girls too... there's this wonderful issue that everyone has been brainwashed with throughout life... the fact that men do all the work in a relationship... wrong! women do your part. and that includes breaking up with the person! if you don't feel anything for him anymore end it! and guys grow some balls! if you want to end it then end it! just try to be tactful about it... im still friends with two of my ex's to this day... its not that hard. and yes i've been through breakups on either side of the fence

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  18. I love this blog. It's so funny!

    The words of wisdom seem fairly sound to me.

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  19. sooo true. i want to slap a few girls i know and throw this blog under their faces!!

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  20. Telling women who obviously aren't aware of their worth that they're not worth it is only going to create more problems for them. They are worth it. That relationship isn't worth it.

    They should leave but with the knowledge that for every dude who can't commit there is another dude out there looking to not be single who will marry you.

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