Friday, January 16, 2009

Mistake #7 Preventing the Roommate/Best Friend Swap


Salt Lake City...we've got a problem. This has been discussed over and over amongst the male species and I think we need to go to the top for some answers. Girls, I really didn't want to do this! Pshhh... yes I did. Frustrating guys for centuries is the infamous Roommate/Best Friend Swap. Many have attempted it, but few have come out with the prized goods. So this is how it pans out: Guy likes girl, girl likes guy, guy and girl start dating, something unfavorable happens & a breakup ensues. All of a sudden, her roommate down the hall looks extra nice & clean smelling at church. Let's just say, for effect, she just happens to be wearing a little Burberry Brit for Women. Sigh... Guy asks her, "how's it going?" The two chat, she starts giggling a little bit, touches his elbow, and they part ways. But not before he totally asks her out, and she accepts. However, lurking behind the Sunday School room is the ex "eagle eying" the whole convo. Her mission for the next few days is to c-block any attempt he has to win the affections of her roommate AKA "Best Friend". She finds every piece of dirt about the guy and spreads it on the roommate like ashes after a funeral. By the time date night comes around, "Grandma Bonaparte is sick and I need to go visit her."Guy sees through the lie, because (he's such a stellar guy and remembers past conversations) he realize it's Friday night and grandma Bonaparte moved back to France 17 years ago. Girls, I don't know what you consider friends, but guys aren't that conniving...we punch each other in the face and move on. Since a majority of you relate well with high school drama, let's break it down Gossip Girl style. Instance #1: Blair and Nate are the über-couple. Blair has an indiscretion with Chuck. Nate finds out gets pissed at Chuck and moves on. Blair and Chuck are in the clear. Instance #2: Vanessa dates Dan pre-show, then comes back into his life but falls for Nate (Dan's eventual pseudo-friend) and Dan's cool. Now here's the flip side. Jenny hooks up with Nate, Vanessa sabotages Jenny (the letter), then Jenny embarrasses the hell out of Vanessa (remember the shear dress?) The minute Dan and Serena break up, Serena totally humiliates Dan's new girl. Why the double standard girls? Some of you need to take your girl Beyoncé's advice: If you liked it, then you shoulda put a ring on it. What do you think?

11 comments:

  1. Well. I thought the blog was going to be about why Mormon girls choose to stay single. Then I saw it was written by some incredibly lame (Mean Girls, Gossip Girl, and Victoria's Secret - can we anticipate that you'll continue with the lowbrow adolescent consumerism? How instructive.) and creepy guy . . . and realized I was right the first time: YOU are an exemplar of why many Mormon girls stay single - by choice.
    Ladies, if this smarmy cretin is representative of the dating pool there in Utah you should light out for the coast (either one); a manchild of this ilk isn't worth batting an eyelash at.

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  2. I avoid this potential problem by only keeping one or two female friends around that aren't as cute as I am. Duh.

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  3. Take it easy, Atella the Hun. It's just for fun. Bitter, perhaps?

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  4. the girls that can't let go and are "eagle eyeing" it and ESPECIALLY the girl who feels guilty and cancels are stupid. he wasn't "the one" (even though thats crap) so get over it and move on. stupid girls.

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  5. Is that a sailboat that just passed me by, or was it Attela's nose in the air?

    To dismiss Mean Girls, Gossip Girl, and VS as lowbrow is closed-minded elitism that borders on ignorance; sure, the three have their share of crass and lascivious--but that does not disqualify them as universally applicable examples of social behavior. If you can come up with more accurate examples of male/female behavior that the majority of readers are likely to recognize, then by all means offer them, instead of wagging an unvalidated finger of "shame, shame".

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  6. frankly everything that i have read in this blog has been shot down by examples in my own life! im sorry to say it... but most people in the church are not shallow. I know my biggest thing in life for what i'll look for in a future wife is her mind. I enjoy... as a person... theater, sports, political discussion/debates, theological/doctrine debates/discussions, overall ranting... and there's plenty more i could list. in short the person i marry will not be in it for my body, or my looks for for how well off i am she will be in it for my mind and she will probably be of the type that will enjoy having these discussions. And yes before you ask i have not yet gone on a mission and therefore am not looking for anyone. so i guess i'm going to have to end this by stating this fact I would rather date a girl that is ugly and easy to talk to than a stuck up douche who is as hot as they come. Because the one that's easy to talk to helps lay the foundation for a strong and healthy relationship. so megan feel free to keep the 'one or two female friends around that aren't as cute' as you are. Just don't be surprised when your not as happy as them later in life due to the relationship (if any) that you are in.

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  7. Just found this blog today and it made me laugh.

    I do disagree on one point, if you date someone (guy or girl) and have a bad break up, their roommates should be off limits. These people live together and either heard or witnessed all the good and bad things about your your previous relationship.

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  8. You seem to be stuck on burberry ..or bourbon,
    no wait - you definitely strike me as a beer
    and cigarette kind of person.

    Lite beer, of course.

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  9. I have to disagree with this one point too. Best friends are supposed to be BEST FRIENDS and although we all know we shouldn't have to "choose sides" that's all BS. We all choose sides and your bff or roomie should be on your side. How difficult would it be for me to have my best friend date a guy I've already dated. This situation has one of two results: either he dumped her (maybe nicely broke things off) but she wasn't willing to end the relationship, or she got rid of him (maybe there was a major flaw or maybe it just wasn't "meant to be") either way there's something wrong with the goods and a bestfriend/ roommate is supposed to give her friend advice on who to date. Also, 9 times out of 10, it's not going to work out for the happy couple and then it's just awkward with the friends when the relationship ends.

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  10. Roommates and sisters definitely need to be off limits. There's just some things you shouldn't do no matter what.

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  11. Let me get this right...girls shouldn't expect relationships to be like romantic movies with their fictional character and fictional relationships, but guys expect girls (but also look at themselves) to base their code of conduct when things don't "work out" on relatively trashy television with its fictional characters with their fictional relationships. OH! I GET IT NOW! Why I didn't see that before...

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