Thursday, January 29, 2009
Suggestion #7 Less is More
As many of you have expressed, "It's what's on the inside that counts." But if that's the case why do you blatantly spackle your face with makeup? I'm not a cosmetologist, nor do I have the urge to run down to the Dallas Roberts Academy to learn, but isn't makeup supposed to enhance your facial features? When our dates show up with their faces 10 times lighter or darker than the rest of their bodies, we're thinking, "Why is she packing so much glorified dirt on her face?" It's just as much of a hassle trying to keep that crap from falling off your face and onto our clothes as it is to apply that mess. The worst is when you have a distinct dividing line between the plastered face, hairline, and neck. Now I understand the "powdering your nose" gesture girls like to throw out on you. Ok, we all, one time or another, have had some sort of complicated skin, but why clog up the situation with concealer and powder. Let your faces breathe every once in a while. Take the Accutane, use the Murad, try some Clearasil. The difference between guys and girls is that you tend to rely on quick fix solutions to a nagging problem. Know why few men have complexion problems after their missions? They let the problems run their course. I know running around with a naked face is somewhat of a faux pas or embarrassment to some of you, but be strong and get over it! It's like wearing braces. Everyone has to wear those unsightly contraptions, but it's better than being 26, single, and having jacked-up teeth. And for you girls who think we don't notice the crumbly makeup covering the acne, we do. Here are my top ten suggestions:
1) Cleopatra died in 50 BC, leave the extended eyeliner crap for Halloween.
2) If you don't have full lips, it's okay. Don't try to Angelina Jolie us by adding lipstick above your natural lip line. We don't fake you out by drawing additional muscle striations in our arms.
3)When adding eyeshadow, take a quick look in the mirror next to a pic of Mimi Bobeck. If you two resemble even a little, tone it down...a lot.
4) When applying make-up you should be able to blend the makeup with the skin around hairline and neck areas. If not, scrub your face and start over again.
5) If you're sweating through your makeup, don't wear it. It can get nasty.
6) Just because you have eyeliner, blush, lipstick, concealer, foundation, and eye shadow doesn't mean you need to use them all going out.
7) Wearing make-up to the gym is ridiculous. You're supposed to sweat there. (Remember #5)
8) Naked lips with a little gloss or nude lipstick is all you need sometimes. Continuous red usage puts your look a little on the whorish side.
9) Don't wear blush if you already have Rosacea on the cheeks, silly.
10) If you need to take a break from makeup, do it! Most girls will be fine with just a little mascara.
Could you at least try this out, please?